Tommy Wiseau loves America. And New Orleans. And sharks. I had the opportunity to attend the world premiere of the new Tommy Wiseau movie Big Shark at Cinema 21 this past weekend. And let me tell you, folks, this is going to be a Big Movie.
Twenty years ago, Tommy Wiseau shocked studios, Hollywood, and the world with the release of The Room. You might be more familiar with the 2017 movie The Disaster Artist featuring James Franco in both the starring and directorial roles. I myself had never heard of The Room or its eccentric director and star until I happened upon The Disaster Artist during the pandemic.
Living in Vancouver, I had seen ads for Big Shark and that it was coming to Portland. I had a gig Saturday night but figured I had time to make it there after the show. I bit the bullet and bought my ticket.
On Saturday, I arrived early to give myself time to find parking, only to find a line already wrapping around the building. The doors opened shortly after 4 p.m., and patrons separated into two lines: one to go directly to seating, the other to get autographs with Tommy. I get in the line for autographs. Tommy, by his own admission, will sign just about anything.
“Tommy, will you sign my movie ticket?”
“Absolutely, I will sign anything!”
The Man in the Box
Tommy’s only request is that you purchase some variety of merchandise. I at least want to see what he has for sale. While I’m standing in line, there is a small commotion from the couple behind me.
“Oh my god, they have the jackets! You have to call Brent.”
I’m curious. “What’s the deal with the jackets?” I ask.
“Our friend saw Tommy last year, and he got one of those jackets. He gets comments on it everywhere he goes.” He pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of his friend wearing a shiny champagne-colored hoodie jacket. “He’s got the one color, but he wants the other.” He turns away to speak to his friend on the phone.
The line moves quickly, and soon I find myself at the merch table. I say a frenzied hello to the staff (The merch table is being run by Cinema 21’s very own Kace as well as Raul Phoenix, one of the stars of Big Shark) and notice the silver jacket previously on display is now gone. I inquire about the jackets. They just sold the last silver color, but they have champagne-colored jackets. So, I get one of those in a medium and a pair of Tommy Wiseau boxers, and a pair of Big Shark socks, which seems appropriate.
Meanwhile, while we wait in line, Brent, the jacket hunter, shows up but is chagrined to find out the silver jackets are gone. About five minutes after he stalks off, a girl in line sees me trying on my new jacket and asks me what size it is. Her silver jacket is a large and bulky on her tiny frame, so we switch jackets and try each other’s on.
“I don’t mind trading,” I say. “But you have to be honest with me. Which looks better?” She relents that the medium does look better on me and decides she is happy with her silver jacket. Soon I find myself face-to-face with Tommy himself. Sort of.
Tommy is dressed in a blue blazer, his designer jeans hanging over his thick-soled boots. He sports a baby blue shirt that offsets the dark blue of his sport coat. Tommy wears dog tags and an assortment of belts around his waist, which are decidedly for fashion. He wears, at all times, his iconic face-wrapping shades and Blue Hawk brand gloves on his hands. He stands in a wooden framed plexiglass cage held together with zip ties. One assumes this is for COVID reasons, but it makes the moment surreal.
In response to one fan’s admission, “I never thought I’d meet you in real life!” Tommy summarizes the situation, “I’m a monkey in a cage!”
I grab a drink from the concession stand and find a seat. Not long after, the lights dim, and Tommy takes the stage to announce a live, unplanned Q&A after the show. It is at this point that my phone goes off. I have a work emergency across town. I have to leave now. And I haven’t even seen the opening credits.
I grab my things to leave. On the way out, a distinguished-looking gentleman asks me what’s wrong. I explain my situation and that I have to go. People are relying on me, and it wouldn’t be fair to them if I stayed. I ask if there is any possible way I could come back tomorrow and exchange my ticket. He asks me to confirm.
“You’re going to come back tomorrow at 4 p.m.?” I assure him I will, and he assures me that I can. I thank him deeply.
As it turns out, Tommy’s clothing line is amazing. The entire night, I’m complimented on my jacket and asked where I got it. The boxers fit snugly in all the right places and give me the impression they make my butt look good. The socks are possibly the most comfortable socks I’ve ever owned. A quick Google informs me that before his film debut, Tommy made his money in the fashion industry. I believe it.
High Marks for “Big Shark”
The next day I arrive even earlier, but the line is wrapped around the building again. At the ticket window, I show them my ticket from the previous day and explain the situation.
“It was a thin gentleman with grey hair if that helps.”
“Oh, if he said it it’s for sure.” It turns out this gentleman is Tom, the owner of Cinema 21. A couple clicks on the computer, and I’m allowed in again.
The line today is different. It’s also much longer. Most, if not everyone here, is a fan of Tommy or The Room. Many I talked to in line Saturday were simply curious to see this phenomenon in person. The Sunday line is vibrant, excited, and filled with repeat customers and new fans, nervous with anticipation to meet Tommy. Fans hand their merchandise over the plexiglass walls to get signed.
If there are people here to mock and ridicule, they are few and far between. A rare individual will walk up to meet Tommy, a mischievous twinkling in their eyes. They pose for a picture with a “look at this guy” expression. But invariably, they all change their pose, some softening to remorse, some to genuine appreciation, if not understanding.
Tommy, for his part, radiates love and gratitude for his fans. It’s hard for the fans to feel anything negative in his presence. Each person is treated to a moment with Tommy as they shout how to spell their name through the plexiglass wall for an autograph and pose for a picture. More than a few give a loud “woo” in concert with Tommy, some traveling as far as Alaska.
“Tommy, we met nine years ago in Edinburgh, Scotland. Do you remember?”
“Was I there?”
The autograph line finishes, and Tommy takes the stage. He thanks the crowd for coming and announces that today is the true world premiere of Big Shark, but also that the movie is unfinished. To wit, this will be a live pre-screening for feedback and audience participation, and his team will return in May with an updated re-cut. With that, the lights dimmed, and Big Shark began in earnest.
What can I say about this movie to do it justice? The movie is Cube-level genius. But this isn’t a Netflix-and-chill movie. The experience of seeing a film like this can only truly be felt in a theater with a big crowd. Not even halfway through the movie, the audience had developed meme-like cheers and callouts for particular events on screen.
In one scene, when Tommy’s character first spots the titular big shark, he screams theatrically. For the rest of the movie, the audience repeats this act every time the shark appears onscreen. Colorful phrases like “delusion of mind” and “you’re occupying my brain!” pepper the dialogue, drawing cheers from the audience. By the movie’s end, the audience was crooning along to the oft-repeated song about cowboys. The fact that it wasn’t finished, audio was missing from sections, or there were odd cuts didn’t matter to the crowd. If anything, it added to the experience.
After the movie, Raul joined Tommy on stage while fans asked questions. Tommy passed out posters with the aid of the Cinema 21 staff. Early on, someone asked Tommy if he was still friends with Greg Sestero after everything depicted in The Room and The Disaster Artist. Tommy’s answer had the crowd going wild as he said, “I don’t know. Greg, why don’t you tell them?” and brought out Greg Sestero.
Greg’s answer was simple. “Well, I’ve known Tommy for 25 years, we’ve made three movies together, and all of them are about best friends. What do you think?”
I hung around after the Q&A to get a brief moment with Tommy & Greg. Tommy was visibly tired but was a good sport and posed for a picture. Before I left, I asked him for a quote for the article. He replied: “You’re giving me delusion of mind! Stop occupying my brain! Go see Big Shark!”
Be on the lookout for the next screening of Big Shark at Cinema 21 in Portland on May 19!
All photos courtesy of Ben Ortlip.
